I dont know about you but from the moment i was born i qas told not to feel or not to feel what i felt.

My parents were proud of the fact they taught me not to cry for no reason with a tap. But who says it wasn’t for a reason? Maybe i felt lonely. Move along a few years if i was mad,sad, excited etc i was told to settle down after a mere moment of expressing my feeling. I remember getting a smack for being excited when i saw the ocean for the first time. I laughed and said oh wow, bam smack, settle down. From that moment i decided to not feel my feelings or express them. Move along some more years, my heart was broken and my lover gave me one day to cry and i was supposed to act act normal after that.

Personally i always felt guilty for feeling anything. Even as a new aged person im told to let go, turn off, turn the other way.

Well I say fuck that and let me feel. Let me heal by feeling, when i actually am allowed to feel i get over shit really quickly, when im denied feelings it takes me a long time to process and deal with things.

Maybe its just my life but i am tired of numbing, faking and letting it go before i an allowed to feel.

Soul and tea

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